SILCON VALLEY, CA – After distributing 8,000 pairs of Google Glass to contest winners, the products reviews have began pouring in. Many testers are ecstatic about the convenience and style of the glasses, but the most outspoken enthusiasts have all been middle age men who are now able to take their children to strip clubs by turning on the Google Glass Parental Control (GGPC) feature. “I use to have to sneak out of the house to go to strip clubs, but now I just tell the wife I’m going to spend some time with the kids and make them wear the glasses!” mentioned father and loving husband Paul Merrifield. The technology works by blocking out all images the glasses recognize as adult material, making it safe for children to be anywhere without seeing their fathers do things they shouldn’t be doing. “I can only hope Google next develops a hearing aid,” said Merrifield when talking about how he hates missing poker night when having to watch his kids.
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The Salty Wag 
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