Kim Jong-un Takes Home North Korea’s Man of the Year Title 3rd Year in a Row

Untitled-2After another year of deep focus and commitment, supreme leader Kim Jung-un has once again won the widely sought after distinction as North Korea’s Man of the Year – earning himself the title now three years running.

“It is such a great honor to win this award” commented Un at an after party celebration in Pyongyang…his city.  “My dream is to outdo my father and grandfathers Man of the Year legacies.  It may take a while, but I think I can do it.”

To achieve this ambitious goal Un would have to compete and win at Man of the Year for the next 61 years.  But with three years already under the belt, he believes that the greatest obstacle he’ll need to overcome is life expectancy.

Since Un’s inauguration in 2010, the competition has been held on a relatively new North Korean national holiday called The Day of the Rising Star – or as Un prefers to affectionately call it, “my birthday”.  However, the winner announcement date had to be pushed back a few months after Un threatened nuclear war earlier this year.

“The Man of the Year award means a lot to me and my country, but my dictatorship feels more important”, “hopefully next year there won’t an equally disheveling hick-up.”

Reports later inquired on local citizens for their thoughts on Un’s achievements – unfortunately though those reports have gone missing.

In Other News:

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–          America’s Political Leaders Believe that Someone Must Be Blamed for the Government Shutdown

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